The Wonder Of The Original Atom - Conclusion

[QUOTING]

What is 'my world'? My world stands and falls with the ensouled life in it. And this ensoulment I am myself. The "I" must annihilate the "I". From the same moment, another I will stand in another ensouled life, in another world order. Nothing of me will enter this Other Kingdom, for it has no need of me. There is no fallen I in my "I"; my "I" fits wondrously well in the world where I exist. I am no 'fallen man' as is said in nature-religious delusion. I was born in this nature of death, and death is my signature, my life. Just by my existence alone, I already spread death and decay around me. I live from death.

No, the fallen self, the sunken self, lies in the Rosebud, in which "I" am not, in which "I" have no share, but which I carry with me. And the fallen "I" can be liberated and live only when I am no more.

Oh, foolish power of ignorance that made me try to enter the kingdom of God! The New Kingdom is for and of the Other Me, dwelling, sleeping in the Rosebud. Would I be able to love the Other One so much that I could give up myself for It?

To be able to love someone, he must be known to you. And so it must be possible to know the nature, the characteristics, the aspects of the Wondrous Atom, to prove them as it were, to experience them, so that the sacrifice of self-immolation can be made for the Other One in this tie of love. For isn't that why I carry the Rosebud with me, so that self-sacrificing love will awaken it? Isn't that the meaning of all holy myths? Isn't that the purpose of all holy scriptures?

Am I now the victim of emotional ecstasy? Is there a Freudian complex acting in me, full of religious, self-chastising eroticism? Can I test my discovery against the modern science of atoms?

I can! Natural science teaches and shows that by the fission of one atom, we can get an atom or atoms of entirely different nature and value. The ending of the one --  consciously -- in the great fire of self-emptying, gives life to the other.

Now I know what the flowering rose bush has to tell us in the language of symbols. The flowering rose bush does not want to beautify the old mouldered shed and make it appear what it is not. The rose bush around the cross of nature, the rose bush of the crucified world soul, shows us the person who, looking into the Rosebud, takes one life to its death in order to keep Another Life. The life that devotes itself to its death is not useless; it is valuable multifariously. It enables the Rosebud to unfold. It is the sweet death, the self-termination of the Gnostics.

As in the mirror of the heart, I see the beloved of which so many initiates have spoken. The world of the holy Other One is revealed to me as eyes that stare at me. I see that the Rosebud has seven petals. I see that the Wondrous Atom consists of seven atoms and that this seven-fold constellation will open up like an expanding universe upon the mighty word: 'Let there be Light'. I see that this seven-fold, stilled manifestation is surrounded in a wide circle by an equally latent zodiac -- a magnetic, fiery circle.

And I hear the Holy Scriptures call this sleeping, as yet dark zodiac, the Throne, the divine Throne. I hear the seven-fold Atom, the seven-petalled Rose, being called the seven Lords before the Throne, and I see this divine microcosm, which is enclosed within me and surrounds me on all sides, has seven fields of activity. I see that there are seven rays and that seven potentialities and seven labors of rebirth have to be completed. I see how candlestick after candlestick is lit and begins to glow with an ineffably glorious light.

And now I understand the beginning of the Apocalypse for the first time. It is the invocation of the person who goes to awaken his Beloved -- the invocation of the person who begins his enduristic work and thus speaks mantramistically:

John to the seven churches that are in Asia: 'Grace to you and peace from him who is and who was and who is to come, and from the seven spirits who are before his throne, and from Jesus Christ the faithful witness, the first-born of the dead'.

And immediately I entered into rapture on this day, which I delivered to the Beloved -- the rapture -- unto fulfillment!

[END QUOTING]

From The Wonder of the Original Atom by Jan van Rijckenborgh .